Hell’s red shadow is cast over John Cena.
Six nights before WWE TLC, the 968th edition of WWE Monday Night RAW was a three-hour RAW SuperShow dedicated to the 2011 Slammy Awards and it came to you, live, from the Norfolk Scope in Norfolk, VA. After a stellar year in the WWE for all six Superstars, only one of the WWE’s top Superstars can win the coveted Superstar of the Year award as WWE Champion CM Punk, John Cena, Alberto Del Rio, World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry, The Miz, or Randy Orton will win the Slammy. After laying Mark Henry out with the Attitude Adjustment and costing the World Heavyweight Champion his match against Zack Ryder last week, two candidates for Superstar of the Year would face off as John Cena went one-on-one with World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry.
Match & Slammy Award Results
- “Tell Me I Did Not Just That” Moment of the Year: Jim Ross for his dancing in a Dance-Off against Michael Cole.
- “Holy %&@*#!” Move of the Year: Mark Henry & Big Show for the superplex that collapsed the ring.
- Big Show def. Wade Barrett by DQ after Wade Barrett brings a steel chair into the ring.
- Pipe Bomb of the Year: CM Punk
- “OMG!” Moment of the Year: Triple H for his Tombstone Piledrive on The Undertaker.
- Fatal 4-Way Match: Non-Title: Dolph Ziggler def. Cody Rhodes, Zack Ryder, & Daniel Bryan by pinning Daniel Bryan following the Zig Zag.
- “#trending” Star of the Year: Zack Ryder
- Game Changer of the Year: The Rock & John Cena for their pact to face off at WrestleMania XXVIII.
- The Miz & Alberto Del Rio (with Wade Barrett) def. CM Punk & Randy Orton by The Miz pinning CM Punk following the Skull Crushing Finale.
- WWE A-Lister of the Year: Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi
- Superstar of the Year: CM Punk
- Non-Title: John Cena and Mark Henry fight to a No Contest after Kane returns.
Six nights before he comes out of retirement to challenge Cody Rhodes for the Intercontinental Title at WWE TLC, the show kicks off with six-time World Champion Booker T and Hornswoggle as they present the first Slammy Award of the night for the “Tell Me I Did Not Just See That” Moment of the Year. The candidates for the Slammy are Jim Ross’ dancing in the Dance-Off against Michael Cole, Santino Marella coming within moments of winning the 2011 Royal Rumble Match, R-Truth getting cost his WWE Title match by “Little Jimmy” at Capitol Punishment, and The Miz impersonating The Rock. The winner of the “Tell Me I Did Not Just That” Moment of the Year was none other than “Good Ol’ J.R.” Jim Ross as the Hall of Famer wins his first Slammy. It does not take long for the self-proclaimed “Voice of the WWE” Michael Cole to interrupt, getting in the ring and hurling insults at J.R. However, Booker T jumps in for the Hall of Famer, calling Cole a “loser” before saying that he bets J.R. could beat Cole in a Rap-Off!
With Booker T and Hornswoggle in tow, Jim Ross heads to the ring for his Rap-Off against Michael Cole as Booker lets Cole go first. With a rap that would make any rapper cry, Cole raps about winning at WrestleMania and that he is “vintage Cole” before J.R. raps back, saying that Cole kissed the feet of “The King” so Cole can kiss his ass. With the crowd firmly behind the Hall of Famer, Booker T declares J.R. the winner of the Rap-Off, but Booker does not let J.R. leave the ring as Booker proclaims that the crowd wants to see a “J.R.-Rooni”. Booker kicks things off with a Spin-A-Rooni before J.R. does his version of the move!
Then it was time to present the second Slammy Award of the evening as three-time WWE Champion and “Hardcore Legend” Mick Foley is joined by Hall of Famer “The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase present the “Holy %&@*#!” Move of the Year Award. The nominees for the award were Sheamus’ powerbomb to Sin Cara through a ladder at WWE Money-in-the-Bank, Randy Orton’s mid-air RKO to Christian on the Steel Steps at SummerSlam, Mark Henry’s superplex to Big Show that collapsed the ring at Vengeance, and Evan Bourne’s Air Bourne off the top of a ladder at WWE Money-in-the-Bank. The winners are then announced as Big Show & Mark Henry take the award. “The World’s Largest Athlete” Big Show comes out to accept the award, saying that it would look really good next to the World Heavyweight Title and that it will become a reality after this Sunday at WWE TLC.
After picking up the “Holy %&@*#!” Move of the Year Award, “The World’s Largest Athlete” was in action as Big Show went one-on-one with Wade Barrett. During the match, the action spills to the outside where Wade Barrett seems to have his sights set on putting Big Show through a table, but “The World’s Largest Athlete” quickly changes Barrett’s mind by destroying the table with his bare hands! Barrett then tries to use a steel chair against Big Show, leading to the disqualification, but Show punches the chair out of the hands of Barrett before shoving Barrett out of the ring. What will happen this Sunday at WWE TLC when Big Show challenges Mark Henry in a Chairs Match for the World Heavyweight Title?
A legend of the Attitude Era then made his return to Monday Nights as the one and only Road Dogg Jesse James returned to present the Slammy Award for Pipe Bomb of the Year. With several candidates, including R-Truth’s comical and confusing sayings and general craziness, R-Truth getting the name of a city wrong, Santino Marella trying to show “President Obama” the Cobra Strike, Stone Cold Steve Austin asking the straightedge CM Punk if he wants a beer, Booker T’s memorable lines on commentary, Booker T getting his lines stolen by Michael Cole & Josh Mathews, The Rock threatening to kick John Cena in his “lady parts”, CM Punk reading a text from his little sister that read “OMG! Kevin Nash? WTF? Thought he was dead, LOL”, Michael Cole squirting barbecue sauce on Jim Ross, Howard Finkel getting choked up during his introduction of CM Punk, Kevin Nash’s limo door being locked when he and John Laurinaitis try to leave the arena, Sheamus telling Beaker from The Muppets that he cannot make the family reunion, Gene Okerlund getting called a “tool” be Pee-Wee Herman for being dressed in John Cena gear, moments from Zack Ryder’s YouTube series, John Laurinaitis flubbing the line “WWE Universe”, and CM Punk asking where his WWE Ice Cream Bars are at. Road Dogg then reveals the winner as WWE Champion CM Punk wins the Pipe Bomb of the Year Award. The WWE Champion then comes out to accept the award with a mannequin wearing a “The Dynamic Dudes” t-shirt and blonde wig. Punk then states that a certain person deserves to be “honored” and, like the mannequin, the individual is “lacking in human characteristics”, sorely lacking in intelligence, and is “anatomically correct”. Punk then presents a “tribute” to the career of John Laurinaitis.
Then it was time for the Divalicious Moment of the Year as four-time Women’s Champion Lita presents the Slammy Award with the nominees being Natalya for her double Sharpshooter, Kelly Kelly winning the Divas Title, Kharma attacking Michelle McCool, and Beth Phoenix’s Super Glam Slam with the winner being named as Kelly Kelly. Before she can give a speech, Kelly Kelly is interrupted by Divas Champion Beth Phoenix & Natalya, but Kelly Kelly slaps the Divas Champion, leading to a near-brawl on the stage.
Santino Marella and The Bella Twins then present the Slammy Award for “OMG!” Moment of the Year with the nominees being Triple H’s Tombstone Piledriver to The Undertaker at WrestleMania, The Rock’s Rock Bottom on John Cena at WrestleMania, the Superstars of the WWE collectively walking out on WWE COO Triple H, and CM Punk winning the WWE Title and leaving the company with it. The winner is then revealed to be Triple H’s Tombstone Piledriver to The Undertaker.
“The Game” then returns to RAW as Triple H, carrying a sledgehammer, appears for the first time since suffering a fractured vertebra at the hands of Kevin Nash several weeks ago. Triple H says that the real “OMG!” Moment of the Year came after his match with The Undertaker, when Undertaker was unable to leave the ring on his own. Triple H continues that, nine months later, The Undertaker is no more and so is his WrestleMania streak. Triple H then turns his attention to Kevin Nash, saying that Nash should have “finished the job” because he is back, adding that, at WWE TLC, “might will make right”. Triple H continues that he will retrieve the sledgehammer at WWE TLC because he is “right”, adding that all the lies and deception are done with and, at WWE TLC, he will prove that he is “right” and Nash is just “done”! What will happen this Sunday at WWE TLC when Triple H faces former best friend Kevin Nash in a Sledgehammer Ladder Match?
Harvard Law graduate David Otunga and WWE Hall of Famer Tony Atlas then announce that a Fatal 4-Way Match will determine the “#trending” Star of the Year with the nominees being Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes, “Mr. Money-in-the-Bank” Daniel Bryan, United States Champion Dolph Ziggler, and “The Long Island Iced Z” Zack Ryder and, whoever trends worldwide on Twitter first will win the Slammy. At the end of a chaotic match, it was Dolph Ziggler hitting the Zig Zag on Daniel Bryan en route to picking up the win. After the match, Hall of Famer Jerry “The King” Lawler presents the Slammy Award for “#trending” Star of the Year to Zack Ryder, but Dolph Ziggler attacks Ryder, hitting the Zig Zag! Will Zack Ryder get his revenge this Sunday at WWE TLC when he challenges Dolph Ziggler for the United States Title?
Still sporting a neck brace and walking on crutches, the injured Christian presents the Game Changer of the Year Award with the nominees being Triple H & Mr. McMahon for Triple H relieving Mr. McMahon of his duties, Edge for his sudden retirement, Kevin Nash for his attack on CM Punk at SummerSlam that allowed Alberto Del Rio to win the WWE Title, and The Rock & John Cena for their pact to square off at WrestleMania XXVIII with the winners being The Rock and John Cena. John Cena then comes out to accept the Slammy Award, proclaiming that the real game changing moment will be at WrestleMania XXVIII when he goes one-on-one with The Rock and they will “change the game forever”!
Four of the six nominees for Superstar of the Year were in action as WWE Champion CM Punk teams with “The Viper” Randy Orton to face The Miz & Alberto Del Rio just six nights before CM Punk defends the WWE Title against The Miz & Alberto Del Rio in a Triple Threat TLC Match. During the match, CM Punk was desperately in need of a tag from Randy Orton, but Wade Barrett emerges from the crowd, who drops Orton face-first onto the ring apron. With CM Punk forced to go it alone, Punk tries to hit the GTS on The Miz, but Miz counters, hitting the Skull Crushing Finale en route to picking up the win for himself and Alberto Del Rio. After the match, Miz and Del Rio retrieve a ladder from ringside, hitting CM Punk in the mid-section with it before hitting the WWE Champion on the back with the ladder before Del Rio stomps on the ladder as well. Del Rio then uses the ladder for a steel-bound cross armbreaker as The Miz taunts Punk, saying that Punk is “done” this Sunday at WWE TLC because one of them will win the WWE Title.
The legendary Goldust then appears with Vickie Guerrero to present the nominees for WWE A-Lister of the Year with the Tony Award-winning Hugh Jackman, The Muppets, Jersey Shore star Snooki, and the Grammy Award-winning Cee-Lo Green with the winner being named as Snooki.
“The Great White” Sheamus was set to compete against Jinder Mahal, but the pre-match comments by Jinder Mahal leads to Sheamus hitting a pre-match Brogue Kick on Jinder, shutting Jinder Mahal up, but also ending the match before it begins.
Then it was time to find out who the 2011 Superstar of the Year would be as none other than “The Master of the 619” Rey Mysterio returns to RAW to present the coveted Slammy Award with the nominees being “The Viper” Randy Orton, The Miz, WWE Champion CM Punk, “The Mexican Aristocrat” Alberto Del Rio, World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry, and John Cena. The winner, as voted on by the WWE fans on WWE.com, is then revealed to be WWE Champion CM Punk! However, Interim RAW General Manager John Laurinaitis comes out as the GM states that CM Punk is in “no condition” to come out there to accept the award, so he gladly accepts it on the WWE Champion’s behalf.
As he sat upon the mound, the question arose, “when shall things be and what shall be the sign of my coming?” He answered, “when she tells us.” She holds the mystery of my arrival; of my rebirth. For when I beckon her, I will return to claim what is mine and things shall never be the same again. On the second day of 2012, it will be the end of the world as you know it.
Then it was time for the main event as, six nights before he defends the World Heavyweight Title against Big Show in a Chairs Match at WWE TLC, World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry went one-on-one with John Cena in a non-title match. During the match, Mark Henry manages to hit the World’s Strongest Slam on John Cena, but the injured ankle prevents the World Heavyweight Champion from capitalizing. With both men down in the ring, an eruption of fiery pyro erupts on the staging area before the entire arena goes. Then, after weeks of vignettes teasing his return, the resurrection of “The Big Red Monster” Kane takes place on RAW as Kane, complete with new gear, long hair, and a new, menacing mask, makes his way to the ring. While Mark Henry narrowly escapes “The Big Red Monster”, Kane was not without a victim as the returning monstrosity grabs John Cena by the throat, planting Cena with a thunderous chokeslam! Kane then removes his larger mask to reveal a new, smaller mask akin to Kane’s mask that he wore nearly a decade as Kane stands over the fallen Cena. What will happen now that a menacing new incarnation of Kane is on the loose in the WWE? Who will Kane target as his next victim?
What did you think of the Slammy Awards edition of the RAW SuperShow? What do you think of Kane’s return? Post your comments in the box below.