The Redman Report: WWE TV Week of 25/6/12: Butterflies Flying in Formation

I can make this my shortest blurb yet. All I need is two letters: A. J.

Really enjoyed Bryan/Punk/Kane. I think most of all I loved the latest Tower of Doom Twist: setting up the Doomsday Device only for Bryan to Victory Roll out and Kane to miss his clothesline. That RULED. Also, AJ skipping around the ring to cost Kane a match, again. And what do you know, Bryan wins!

Kane going all wacky Kane backstage – “I’m not exactly boyfriend material” – was excellent. He is finally extricating himself from her devious, match-costing clutches. And then there were two.

Raw in general was the AJ Show, and man did she nail it. Her crazy ass promo to herself in the opening was amazing. Battle Royal was fun for Vickie inserting herself in it and actually looking pretty damn good. Also for AJ eliminating Layla and then the Vickie finish. DIVAS TITLE MATCH, NOW. Also, I am the biggest Divas mark alive and even I didnt recognise like the first three women who went out. Of course I might have if commentary was actually calling the match and identifying people. Or if they had enough time to do so before they were gone. Humph.

I really like the continuing Show/Brodus thing. This should have been on the next PPV, really, because when they announced it was happening I was stupidly excited. But its 2012. Anyway, Brodus manning up and knocking Show down is so much fun. Liked his knee giving out and being crushed under Show too. And the KO Punches, just to be a dick. I really hope this isnt the end of it, these guys are really fun together. I’m probably fantasising, but Brodus coming back and getting a pin on Show would blow the roof off.

SID! Slater as the weekly jobber-to-the-past-stars is great. When I heard “RULER OF THE WORLD” I couldnt believe that they actually got Sid in. And the internet explodes. He didnt work as well as Vader did to get the “wow you still got it” pop, but it was fun nonetheless. Cant wait to see who else they get.

Also, as goofy and preposterous as it was to change the rule of the Pole match during the finish of the match, I thought the Dolph/Alberto wacky cartoon chase for the contract was some amazing ridiculous fun while it lasted.

I have to admit, goofy as it was I enjoyed Cena’s Star Wars promo. I saw “Fired, you are” coming from a mile away, and it delivered. Also, Cena cracking himself up was pretty funny to watch. “What are you, nine?” was fun as well, but the “What are you going to do, suspend me?” was some lame ass pandering for an insider pop that never materialised. Nobody ever learns from history.

I was pumped for their main event since it hasnt happened in a while and they always work well together. Even as shortish as it was it was fun, I can dig them getting a proper rematch. Show leg dropping Cena in the Walls was cool, as was Jericho’s look turning from anger at the interference to concern that Show would kill him to glee at handing over Cena instead. As far as Big Show heel finishes go I prefer the Cobra Clutch, but what the hell.

WOAH SMACKDOWN IS AJ VS LAYLA!

I cant even begin to decide what was the most amazing thing about this whole segment. A show opening with a match? A show opening with A WOMEN’S MATCH? Layla coming out to Tiffany’s “I’m insatiable I cant get enough”? AJ and Layla getting their babyface workrate on and going nuts? Daniel Bryan skipping around the ring to cost AJ a match? Vickie blasting Bryan for having a repetitive catchphrase? The Bryan-AJ “YES!” off? Bryan getting pissed and going “NO! NO! NO!”?

So much win in this. Best opening 15 in forever. And it needs to be stressed that I loved the hell out of Layla/AJ, even with the screwy ending, and we can only hope that this means they’ll have a proper rematch very soon.

What a collection of randoms for the SD MITB so far. Sandow, Tensai, Santino, Tyson Kidd, Christian. I am especially stoked for Tyson though, the dude has been awesome with no reward for far too long and he is going to go NUTS all over this thing. Makes up for not having Gabes in again. Tensai in a ladder match is fascinating, as in Santino. The nearfall Santino gets in the MITB match with his hand on the case is going to be amazing.

And as an aside, Booker’s line during Kidd/Swagger about “you gotta get the butterflies to fly in formation” was the most amazingly clever thing he’s ever said.

Smackdown main event ruled. Somehow I am still able to be interested in Sheamus and Dolph #97. Kofi must be jealous. But hell this was a super fun three way, with a whole giant sized helping of babyface ass kicking, so I was sold. Sheamus gets it so hard. And boy was I marking out bro when he got his arm dropkicked off by Dolph. My favourite injury of all time. The moment where the heels just beat the absolute JESUS out of Sheamus on the floor was magnificent. As was the next moment in the ring where Dolph climbs up and Alberto went for the quick cover. I laughed. And the stretch with all of the turns was great, before finally Dolph had that ROLLUP and Sheamus KILLS him once again. Really, really great main event.

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