“Push it to the limit. Walk along the razor’s edge but don’t look down, just keep your head and you’ll be finished. Open up the limit past the point of no return. You’ve reached the top but still you gotta learn how to keep it.”
Wise words from Giorgio Moroder there. And ones that tenuously apply tonight’s WWE PPV. Is Big Johnny gonna go bye-bye? Will my boys D-Bry and Punk tear the house down as they are oh so capable of doing? Is anyone gonna be that bothered about the Tag Title match? The answers (vaguely) to these and other questions lie within…
It’s B PPV time! Or maybe even C, I haven’t rightly made my mind up yet. We’re entering into this one on minimal build (another reason why I don’t like there being so many damn PPVs in the year), so I’m not rightly sure exactly what I’m gonna be writing about for some of these. And as one lovely reader pointed out in last month’s comments I…err…I kinda suck at this whole prediction thing big time. I’m not sure how this preview’s gonna turn out, so let’s just agree to do what we can to get through this, and if it sucks you can give me grief in the comments later. Okay? Okay.
Zack Ryder vs. Kane
Pre-show baby! I’m warming to the idea of there being a preshow before the PPVs. It reminds me of the old countdown shows that used to show the recap videos for the big PPV matches and try to entice you to shell out on the event itself. They were always kinda cool at getting me hyped. Essentially they do what I do here, but in a cooler, less rambly fashion. So yeah, preshows, good move WWE.
Now we’ve got that out the way, let’s move on to their choice of pre-show match. It’s Zack Ryder folks! Remember him? Do any of you still care? Because I do, damnit! Even though WWE seemed hell bent on refusing to let Zack get over, and removing any momentum he had by making him John Cena’s fall guy I still like the guy. He’s a goof, his show is funny, and I just want to see him get a fair crack at something. That why I’d love to see him beat Kane. It’d be retribution for the entire last 12 months. Kane has made Zack Ryder his b*tch for a long, long time, and it’s about damn time Ryder got his win back.
I doubt that’s gonna happen though. As if WWE are gonna let Zack Ryder beat Kane, even if it is just the pre-show to the main PPV. I’d like to hope this is the start of some kind of feud with Kane where Ryder is trying to finally get a little retribution on the Big Red Monster, but I’m sure that seems entirely too logical a booking option to actually happen.
Seriously though, that’s what I think is happening here. But then I’ve been known to be wrong (oh so very wrong) many time before, so don’t be surprised if this is nothing more than Kane kicking Zack’s butt in quick fashion.
Who I want to win: Ryder, just so he can think he’s got his win back, only for Kane to ballistic and the feud to be ignited.
Who I think will win: Kane. They generally treat Ryder as such a goofball it’s hard to imagine that they’d let him get a win over Kane. Let’s what and see, eh?
WWE Divas Championship Match
Layla © vs. Beth Phoenix
Layla…you’ve got me on my knees, Layla, I’m begging darling please. *frantic air guitar* Sorry, got a bit lost in the moment there. So yeah, Layla’s back everyone. And you’re not enough for her (WAAAAAAOOOH NOOOOOO!!). Oh Layla, how I’ve missed you and your lovely smile, and you’re slightly weird accent. And now we get to see her and Beth Phoenix get it on!!
This could be good, well, better than most people probably think it’s gonna be. I’m actually hoping this one gets a little time, because we know both girls can work and should work well together. Give them at least a solid 10 minutes and this has the potential to be quite a cool little title match.
Who I want to win: Layla. We can’t have her pretty face being ruined by a Glam Slam now, can we?
Who I think will win: Hmmm. Probably Layla I reckon. Beth hasn’t had any consistent competition, and it makes sense to have Layla hold the strap for a while longer.
WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Kofi Kingston & R-Truth © vs. Dolph Ziggler & Jack Swagger
I really have very little to say about this match. I’m trying to think of something, but we all know the drill with these guys. Kofi vs. Dolph is always crammed full of win, and Truth and Swagger keep up their side of the deal nicely. It’s just…I dunno, neither of these teams seem like “real” teams? We’ve got two tag teams, competing who are actually just singles guys mashed together for the sake of it.
Has tag team wrestling really fallen this far? Do we really have this few tag teams ready to come through? Did they really disband the Kings of Wrestling? I’m starting to wonder why they even bothered with the tag titles at all any more. What happened to this fabled reinvention of the tag division? I was so excited for that, and it just didn’t happen. Unamused.
And because this is just two teams of singles guys I’m really not bothered about the outcome too much. Give me two decent teams and a decent feud backing them up and I’m all about the tag teams, but this just smacks of a resounding “meh” to me.
Who I want to win: Kofi & Truth. Just because I like watching Truth celebrate with Little Jimmy.
Who I think will win: Kofi & Truth, but I don’t think WWE are that bothered themselves, so I don’t see why we should be.
World Heavyweight Championship Fatal 4 Way Match
Sheamus © vs. Chris Jericho vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Randy Orton
Ooooooh, intriguing! A straight up one on one between Sheamus and ADR has been altered to include Jericho and Orton. Did they not think Del Rio and the Great White could carry an upper card match by themselves? I was originally calling a straight forward Sheamus win in this one, but now I’m not so sure.
After watching the last few weeks of Raw and Smackdown I can’t help but feel that Orton and Sheamus are gonna be distracted with each other and allow one of the heels to slip in to steal the win, and the title. We know Jericho’s off on tour with Fozzy soon, so that leaves ADR as my most likely candidate to win the title here.
Add in the fact that we’re now under Fatal 4 Way rules with no disqualifications or count-outs, and that Sheamus doesn’t have to be pinned to lose the title, then it looks like our favourite cheeky Irish fella may have a long night ahead of him.
I could go for ADR as champ. Del Rio seems built for being champ on Smackdown, and it was just poor timing that stopped that from happening in 2011. ADR & Ricky Rod ruling Smackdown could be a helluva lot of fun. Go on, think about that for a second. I reckon it’d be awesome.
Who I want to win: *deep breath* AAAAAALBEEEEERRRRTO DEL RIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Who I think will win: I still think that ADR is gonna sneak the win from under the noses of Orton and Sheamus. There’s bound to be some sort of shenanigans going down, but Del Rio has to be a strong pick in this one.
WWE Championship Match
CM Punk © vs. Daniel Bryan
I think my Mark Out valve exploded when this match was announced. Seriously, anyone who used to watch these guys in ROH couldn’t have imagined back then that someday these guys would competing on PPV for WWE’s top title? This match right here shows me that no matter how down I get on wrestling these days, every now and then they do something right. Like giving us a Punk/Bryan match on PPV for the main title. Good Lord my anticipation-meter is reading off the charts.
Is anyone else looking forward to this as much as I am? The champion vs. champion series these guys had on Raw a few weeks ago was great enough, but now we get Punk and Bryan in a nice long time slot getting to go out and throw everything they’ve got at each other. I’m expecting big, big things from this.
I could watch these two guys wrestle all night, and to be perfectly honest if Punk does drop the title, well, I’d be okay with that. If anyone deserves the strap after the work they’ve put in, it’s Bryan. The guy has been magnificent in the last few months, and doesn’t show any sign of stopping. Whatever happens in this match we’re all gonna be winners. Mark my words.
Who I want to win: CM PUNK!! CM PUNK!! CM PUNK!! Although just this once I wouldn’t mind in the slightest if my guy lost.
Who I think will win: Tough call on this one. I think it’s gonna end up with a Punk win, but I could see it easily going either way.
John Cena vs. John Laurinaitis
Yep, I’m gonna go ahead and assume that this match is gonna be the main event of the evening. I’d love it to be Punk and Bryan, but it’s pretty obvious Cena’s getting top billing on this PPV, especially because he’s going up against “the man”.
Which brings us to “the man” in this situation, John Laurinaitis. I still hate him, but I think I hate him in the way the WWE want me to hate him. I still think he’s a bumbling buffoon of a corporate yes man, and that’s exactly how he’s being portrayed. They’ve added in an extra bit of evil b*stard this week with the way he embarrassed and fired Big Show, which I’m all for, and in all honesty Johnny being the boss of both shows hasn’t been as bad as thought it would be.
The question we have to ask is if Cena does get the win tonight, who takes charge of the shows? Teddy Long? Could this be the reason Foley came back? Who would be the new GM? And more importantly would they be more entertaining than Johnny Ace is right now?
But all that talk is jumping the gun somewhat, because we only talk about a possible new GM if John Laurinaitis loses. This is “the Hulk Hogan of Japan” we’re talking about after all. I’m loving the ridiculous bigging up of Big Johnny’s skills in the videos. They’ve been all over WWE.com recently, so if you’re killing some time before the show you should go check them out.
So let’s see, how could Johnny Ace pull this off now that the board have already decreed that anyone who gets involved in the match gets terminated? Everytime someone mentioned being terminated I can’t help but think of Arnold Schwarzenegger, but I digress, how is Johnny gonna be able to pull himself out of this scrape?
Well dependant on how management is doing things this week someone could potentially help Johnny win, and be rehired by Johnny the next night? Although that seems unlikely, so I think we’re looking at Johnny getting some assistance from someone who isn’t currently held under a WWE contract, or doesn’t care if they lose their job. Let’s see…who do we know who either doesn’t have a contract or doesn’t want their contract? Hmmm…Big Show and Lesnar maybe? Show could be looking to get his job back by any means necessary, and Lesnar’s currently in the middle of suing the WWE for breaching his contract. Either man could interrupt this match without risking their job, so to speak. Or could it be someone else? Someone being introduced to make a big impact? Personally I’d quite like it to be a Big Show heel turn, because that means somewhere down the line (if everything goes to plan) he’s gonna tangle with Ryback. Which should be awesome. I’m talking at least 6-7 months away, but yeah it’s something I could see happening.
So yeah, some kind of sneaky shenanigans are afoot. Surely Big Johnny can’t get a clean win over Cena, regardless of how “injured” Cena is? Can he?
Who I want to win: Big Johnny. I can’t think of anyone to replace him as GM, and I want a crazy screwy finish.
Who I think will win: Well I got this wrong last time when I said Brock HAD to win, so I dunno? I’d like to assume that Laurinaitis is winning in some kind of screwy fashion, but you never know where Cena is concerned. Screw it, let’s say Big Johnny.
So there you have it. Over the Limit. I’m calling Punk vs. Bryan for my match of the night, and I expect there to be at least one new champion before all is said and done, so it should be pretty cool. Think you know better than me (which, let’s face it, wouldn’t be that difficult)? Then the comment box below awaits you my friend.
So yeah, sit back, relax, and while you’re waiting for the show to begin I recommend listening to the following song on loop…
See you next time folks!!